/// CREATIVE INTENTIONS - JANUARY REFLECTION ///

To recap what I planned my Develop Your Creative Practice funding from @aceagrams Arts Council England would allow me to do (amongst other things):

- Equip myself with a new skills, working on a larger scale and with new materials

- Work on a new way of understanding, opening up my way of seeing/working

- Having the time to play and reflect

- Learn to create in an adventurous, more free way

- Converse with other creative practitioners, for advice, guidance and feedback

- Have dedicated studio time for creating without the pressure of needing a finished product

The funding period started January 1st so I thought I would post a little reflection of the first month.

My 35 hours were divided between 30 sketches a day for 30 days - the purpose was to break me out of my usual rigid approach to drawing and into a new way of thinking/mark marking. Become more fluid, more abstract, to have fun with it. And it worked, I find if I start to draw in what was my default style of strong lines mirroring exactly what I see I get bored of it, very quickly. I am now naturally inclined to experiment, express myself differently. I am going to build upon that this month. I also learnt that what makes me feel really uncomfortable to start with soon becomes familiar and enjoyable.

And in fact over on Instagram my most liked day of sketches was my most "uncomfortable", again cementing the fact that art does not have to be a true representation of what the eye sees. You need to add your soul into the mix. Let the art come through you, through your heart. Not just from your eyes to your hands. I need to stop playing it safe, and have the gumption to allow myself to explore who I am artistically once I stop worrying about if what I do is good enough. If it is good enough for me, it is good enough full stop!

The other portion of my time was spent on skills development. Two days of soldering on a much larger scale that I have done before. I have pigeon-holed myself into creating things of a certain size, and that is mostly down to the cost of silver dictating size limits, but also I penned myself into my little safe area of where I know I can achieve my desired outcome.

But that has become boring and I’ve outgrown it. I'm motivated to grow, pushing myself further than I have before and tackling my fear of these things head on. The two days soldering with Warren made me realise I'm much more competent than I give myself credit for, and I need to stop giving air time to the doubts which try and hold me back. Be as fearless as I encourage my students to be.

I also spent time hand engraving, something I hope to build on here and there. Anyone who has tried it can attest that it's pretty bloody hard so I need to keep it up little and often. Although it has also made me consider using etching more in my designs...

I also had a zoom chat with Melody Vaughn, who was a great sounding board and helped me to make sense of the jumble of emotions I was feeling about the first month of this project. It had become overwhelming and I was struggling to see a way forward without feeling like I was on an endless treadmill. Having someone to take everything through with, who knows the creative world and is an experienced educator and curator was incredibly beneficial. Melody knew what questions to ask me so I could get everything out, to then piece it all together in a helpful way.

I learnt a lot this first month, too much to fit into this post so as usual I will do a longer reflection over on the Journal area of my website.

TLDR; its been bloody brilliant. Hard, uncomfortable, confronting, and brilliant.

Supported using public funding by Arts Council England